Saturday, 14 September 2013

Oh so messy...

As I both do nothing, with my life, and aspire to do very little, I always find myself tidying for hours on end, I do not mean for this to seem like I adore cleaning. I enjoy sorting things, but I come from a family of hoarders. And with tendencies in which I cannot deny, I too collect random junk. I feel emotional for throwing away old broken hair dryers, old tiles, and over the years everyone else's junk has accumulated in my room and I just haven't had the heart to throw such objects away. I constantly look for uses from these, such as food jars become hair clip and bead jars, old ribbons from cakes and clothing go in my crafts book, but no matter who much I go through there's always another mountain to go through.

I currently face my deepest and most painful problem of going through clothes. The memories of me and my family wearing such clothes makes it almost impossible to throw such hideous objects out, as much as I dream of having a cute tidy wardrobe, my floor is constantly surrounded in everyone else's junk I need to sort through. even yesterday my sister threw in a bag of junk she didn't want which has lead to more and more clothes to sort through. I've sorted through these clothes over 50 times this year already and I've only got rid of around 10 articles of clothing.

Where I both see the potential in object, say old t-shirts becoming pillows and craft material, there is far to much to keep as side till then. I've only just finally decided what to do with a t-shirt I've been hoarding since I was 6 but how long will it take me to figure out what to do with the others, and will I have the heart to do it?

Though through writing this I feel a surge of passion to sort through this clutter, I don't know if sheer laziness will crab hold of me again to the point where I can no longer keep the will power to not throw away this endless junk. I have one pile for average wear, one Lolita pile, one cosplay, one swim stuff and underwear etc, one for my mother etc and one charity. though by the end of each day these piles merge together again, thus making me start from the beginning the very next day.

I've been working on this room for years now, but I've only finally gained the true motivation to tidy it through Lolita. I long for an elegant and tidy organised room, but until I can overcome the hoarding tendencies I think I'll be sorting through old slippers and broken hangers for weeks to come.

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